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Top 10 Reasons for Divorce

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I’ve always heard that money issues are one of the top reasons for divorce in the US, but when I went looking for statistics about causes for divorce, I had a surprisingly difficult time finding a reputable source to justify this claim.

Sooo, who knows? But, I did find this law office (site here) that provided a Top 10 list of reasons for divorce in America. Don’t know how reputable it is (would have loved to see a Nation-wide survey done by someplace that is not affiliated with making money from divorce….like a Gallop poll or something), but here ya go:

Top 10 Reasons for Divorce in the US  (according to these guys):

10. Boredom

9. Careers

8. Inability to have children

7. Loss of Interest

6. Abuse

5. Lack of communication

4. Addiction Problems

3. Social Networks

2. Cheating

1. MONEY ISSUES

 

So there you have it.

I bring this up because my husband has just come off a 16-day work stint (yes – 16 days in a row with no days off). Right now we are lucky to be in a place financially that money is not a big issue. We have enough to pay all of our bills and put a hefty amount toward debt payments each month. If we really stay nose-to-the-grind, we’ll be debt free in just another 2-3 years! That’s fabulous, right? (especially considering when I started blogging in March 2014 we had almost $150,000 in debt!!!!)

Well, yes. It’s certainly a good thing. We haven’t had an argument about money in a long, long time. We may have disagreements (like, he wants to put more toward savings and I want to put more toward debt), but no actual “fights.”

But you know what we’ve had a couple arguments about lately? Time. I was originally going to title this post “Time versus Money” because those feel like the two options we’re having to select between.

Husband’s business has been crazy busy lately (he owns a small wood flooring business). This is an awesome thing because he could unexpectedly have a solid week off work if a job were to cancel, or there’s subfloor issues that need to be fixed, etc. etc. etc. We can never “count” on the next job so his motto has always been that he must work while there’s work to be had. Things always traditionally slow down around the winter holidays. No one wants someone ripping up their floors and making a mess over Thanksgiving or Christmas, ya know?

So the issue is this:  time or money. What’s more important? I’ve been feeling like a single Mom a lot lately. I do it all: cooking, cleaning, yard work, taking care of the dog, the kids, household chores and errands, etc etc etc. Meanwhile, hubs has been working basically all day, every day. He usually works doing flooring from 7am-4pm, then he might come home for a couple hours, and go back out again in the evening to do bids. Then he comes home and takes time to write up and email out estimates. Plus, the phone calls are incessant. ALL.THE.TIME he gets calls from customers, his employees, the stores he sub-contracts through, etc. It’s endless. So I’ve been feeling a bit neglected and sorry for myself. And when I bring it up, the question is always the same:  Would you rather me work less and make less money???

Phooey.

Knowing that this is not how things will be forever I just grit my teeth and bear it. But it was certainly interesting to see “careers” listed at the #9 reason for divorce. I think this whole time-issue that I bring up could certainly fall under the career category.

Anyway, this is just something I’ve been thinking about as of late and wanted to bring it up.

Between the options of time or money, which would you select and why? I’m sticking to our debt-reduction goals and picking “money” right now, with the knowledge that inevitably we’ll have more time down the road when business slows down a bit. But it still doesn’t make the present very fun!

Like we mentioned above, addiction is one of the leading causes for divorce in the U.S. If you or your spouse is suffering from addiction dont let it destroy your life. If you want to learn more about rehab check out this real-life alcoholic story.

Cable Win!

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Remember when I talked about how my cable bill was going up and the whole headache it caused? (Cliff’s Note version: I was initially told there was nothing they could do about it; after a second call I was miraculously granted a new, lower, promotional rate for another year).

Well one of the readers said I should’ve gotten it in writing. They were right!

My bill showed up and what SHOULD have been about a $90 bill (maybe $95 with taxes) was for $118.60. No freaking way.

I called back and – shocker – there was “no record” of the new promotional rate I had locked in. After a long back-and-forth I got upset and asked to speak with a manager. I explained the whole situation and the manager was able to give me the promotional rate I’d been promised and to back-date it so I didn’t have this one super high bill. He said to call back in 24 hours and the new rate would be updated so I’d know how much I owed this month.

I did one better. I waited 3 full days. And when I called back the automated system said I owed….$118.60. I was livid. Absolutely furious that I would have to do this whole dog-and-pony show all over again – speaking to customer service rep, being transferred to a manager, the whole shebang.

When the customer service rep answered I calmly explained the whole situation. I started off with, “I don’t know if you can help me, I may end up needing to be transferred to a manager, but….” and I launched into the whole story.

So the representative asked me how much the automated system said I owed and I told her, “$118.60.”

Her reply: “Well I guess the automated system hasn’t been updated because my records indicate that you owe $34.62.”

Me: * stunned silence *

“No, no, no”, I thought. “That sounds way too low. Is that $118.60 and an additional $34.62 on top of it for something? What does that amount cover???”

The rep explained that it looked like they had given me a $150-some-odd-dollar credit for the month of August, so all that was owed was $34.62. After that, my rate would be the $89.99 (cable + internet) rate that I was quoted from my call that was, at this point, a full month ago.

I’m still a little skeptical that there’s been some confusion and I’m going to get slammed with a big bill, but everything the representative said seemed to make sense. I don’t know why the manager hadn’t told me he was giving me a $150 credit, but I guess that amount covers my “pain and suffering” for having to make these multiple phone calls over the past few weeks. Regardless, I’ll take it!

Soooo, since Sallie Mae decided to double-charge me this month and I’ve been looking for ways to come up with an extra $250 to put toward the car payment, I’m pretty pleased with this result. Instead of the $100 I budgeted toward cable/internet this month, I’ll only be spending $35. I “found” an easy $65 right there! Woo!!!!

Unrelated side-note: When I heard the automated system tell me I still owed $118, I jumped on Twitter and tweeted the company, saying how dissatisfied I was with their service and that they were about to loose a customer. I was thinking I might hear back from them (Comcast/Xfinity), but I didn’t. Guess who tweeted me instead….DirectTV replied by saying, “Ashley – we would LOVE to have you as a customer and we have lots of special rates right now! Can I set up a package for you?” HAHA! How genius of them to “follow” the Comcast tweets!!! The response was nearly immediate, too! I’m telling you – social media is changing the way companies do business. It’s crazy!