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Confessions Time: Hiding in Shame


I disappeared on you. And I won’t beat around the bush (I mean, the post title has “confessions” in it). It’s mostly because I got very spendy.

Three Paycheck Month

January has been one of those coveted three-paycheck-months for me. January’s rent was paid out of my December 20th check. I got paid on January 3rd, and that went to debt, savings, and monthly bills other than rent. And then I got paid on the 17th and blew more than half of it on unneeded items. Why? Probably because I’m riding high on a feeling of success right now. There was the news of my promotion, my extra-large bonus, and I’ve lost a little weight from maintaining regular exercise. I started running and lifting weights to keep the great sleep record I had in Nova Scotia going, and I’m feeling great all around. I know I owe this confessions post to you….here goes! But first, a photo of my frozen eyelashes. I have been running in some crazy weather, and I love it!

So Why the Shame?

The reception to my last post about spending a couple thousand dollars to go to Europe to see my family SHOCKED me. You guys, a year ago I was in financial shambles. I was still borrowing money from my little sister in university to cover bills! I had no idea how to get past the paycheck to paycheck cycle. For anyone interested, by the way, I have been keeping a calendar almost identical to this one for about eight months, and I credit this method entirely with my newfound ability to never go into debt on a paycheck any longer. I spent over a decade of my life adding to debt each month and stopped immediately last year. Since then, I’ve been actively knocking down debt and haven’t added a single dollar of debt.

When I started blogging here, I didn’t have a penny of savings (outside of the bare minimum for work retirement plan matching). This lady tried to save money her whole life and couldn’t manage it. And now I save by habit every single month, in many areas – investments, my savings account, and my retirement!

My Plan Is Not Your Plan

Let me repeat this again: I am not here to be aggressive about paying down debt. This isn’t going to be some magical transformation in which I am debt-free in five months, even though I could be. There is more than one way to skin a cat and the only one who has to be at peace with my choices is me. Some of my dearest family members are in their 80s and I haven’t seen them since 2017. I know what feels right in my heart. That said, I am taking into consideration the advice some commenters mentioned, saving for the trip and using my entire bonus for debt. I’ve got to crunch some numbers and see what I can do.

I’m proud of my radical transformation! I was a financial DISASTER last year. So, I decided to not go crazy but to get a few things done with the magic extra paycheck money that I had wanted to for a long time.

Confessions of a Spendy Blogger!

Where did the money go? Here are some highlights (or lowlights, as many commenters will likely feel):

  • $225 on a barely used $700 espresso machine with a lifetime warranty. I called the company and had the warranty issued to me with no problem
  • $210.50 for four tickets to the Toronto Blue Jays Home Opener. I haven’t missed a Home Opener since I was 15 years old. I’m a rabid fan and my mum, sister, and nephew are flying out to join me! They are paying for their airline tickets, so I got the Jays tickets. I took the lower seats out of my cart and swapped in nosebleed seats to save some cash.
  • $130 on Chinese New Year dinner at a beautiful seafood restaurant with nine of my friends. I took care of my Chinese friend’s dinner. She was devastated to not be able to travel home to see her family due to coronavirus. She’s also fresh out of school with little money and it felt like a nice thing to do. SIDE NOTE: This was one of the best meals I’ve ever had in my life, and the only time I went out at night since January 4th.
  • $92 on Noom. I mentioned I tried this back in September and I loved it! But at $59/month, I wasn’t going to sign up. They sent me an email offering me a full year for $92 and I signed up right away. I’m on week four now and I am forming habits I never thought I could. I’ve only lost a few pounds but I’ve shed a decent amount of inches and did I mention I AM SLEEPING LIKE A BABY? Life-changing.
  • $60 for brisket to make traditional corned beef for a dinner party on Friday. That’s sitting in my fridge for ten days and then will be delicious
  • $50 for a memory foam dog bed
  • $70 for a nice blazer and $18 for alterations.
  • $220 to my for-fun investment account, which is currently giving me 12% returns
  • $60 for two lunches out with colleagues (around $30 each)

Ending on a High Note

After my usual groceries and living expenses, I still have about $800 of that paycheck left.

For the first time EVER, I managed to track every single transaction in a month! I am using the One-Twenty-Five budget I mentioned in a previous post and it is working for me. Like, seriously working for me! Trying to automate all my transactions with Mint.com or YNAB just never worked, and I distinctly disliked trying to figure out what wasn’t being captured. With this new budget, I just log in to Google Sheets on a coffee break at work every other day and tally up my transactions from my various online accounts. I almost never use cash, so this is working very well! I’m so happy to see the numbers, but also pretty horrified. It had to be the most hedonistic month that I finally figured out how to track my spending.


  • Reply jj |

    I definitely missed the part where you said Europe, I thought it was an East Coast trip. Your method is different, but you are right it has to work for you. Once you are paying things down and finding a good balance, that is what is important. I think a lot of the other commentators are just frustrated by other posters who make seemingly rash decisions but then say they have no $$ for an emergency or something.

    BTW- if you need help finding a ticket or accommodation or both for your trip, I recommend the Impatient Tourist – she is amazing.

  • Reply Laura |

    Pretty much every post of yours is how you overspent but don’t feel bad about it, then getting defensive about not caring about aggressively paying down debt. You do you, but I don’t know why you are writing at blogging away debt if you don’t care about it.

  • Reply Margann34 |

    If your goal is not to rapidly pay down debt, then why are you blogging on Blogging Away Debt? In all honestly, I don’t really understand what your end goal is. It is your money, and you can do what you want with it. But is all of the extra spending helping you to reach your life goals? What are your life/financial goals anyway?

  • Reply Kili |

    Hi Elizabeth,
    glad you found a way to track your spending that works for you.
    I am a bit baffled by your admission of the financial shambles you were in just so recently.
    I thought you had been in that well paid position for quite a while now. Maybe you can give us a bit more of the background of your success in gaining financial stability so far.

    Keep up the good work.
    I definitly support your decision for the travel to Europe. I think there have been some great suggestions on your last post though. Given your rather large income, I am sure you could make it a challenge to save up the needed amount by the time of travel.
    Have a good week.

    P.S.: Do you and the other bloggers keep a blogging schedule of sorts? It has been a couple of days since the last entry…. and now your post is “buried” behind two other posts on the same day.

  • Reply Louise |

    I just re-read your last blog post and the comments. Maybe you should do that too! It’s not as bad as you think. You didn’t mention the trip was to Europe; people are assuming it’s within Canada in the comments. And I only found one comment that politely gave you “flak” about the vacation spending and multiple supportive ones along with other neutral comments.

So, what do you think ?