I had the most amazing opportunity this past weekend. I hid out in a dungeon. Me and my thoughts, my books and my laptop. I really did need a reset. And my best friend provided the space for me to do just that. It was wonderful! And I highly recommend it to everyone.
Not really a dungeon
Ok, it wasn’t really a dungeon. It is a room in her basement that has no windows. It’s cozy and dark down there. I would compare it to a soft version of a sensory deprivation chamber. Those freak me out a bit. But this was perfect.
No responsibilities. No sound. I arrived Friday late afternoon with a full back pack of thought provoking materials, journals, highlighters, and pens galore. And went directly into isolation.
I began my time with a plea to God to meet me here. To direct and guide me. And then I spent the next 48 hours diving in, sitting in my thoughts, studying and debating, and breathing. (Ok, I did take a break Saturday evening to enjoy a family meal with my friend, her family, Princess and Princess’ boyfriend.)
And I listened. I listened to my heart, to my head, to the guidance the books gave me, and prepared myself for whatever is to come next. I made lists upon lists. Lists of what I could do for work. Documented the life I want to build. Questions I need to consider.
It was so, so good.
Starting over again
In many ways, I am starting over again. Single again. Job change in the immediate future. Kids are all grown and mostly independent. I needed this time to breathe and focus on what I want. While I didn’t come away with the answers and clarity I had hoped for. I learned so much and have so much hope for the future to come.
Two things that have been made very clear to me over the last couple of months as I have dug into self care and reading like crazy:
- We believe 100% of what we tell ourselves. And what we believe we achieve. I must do better at appreciating who I am, what I am capable of, and especially knowing my own worth.
- Change does not mean failure or scarcity. It’s opportunity for growth, improvement, and more! “Every new beginning begins with an ending” (no idea who said that) – and this is my new beginning! I’m ready for it. It’s going to be the best chapter yet, I believe that.