Blogging Away Debt Blogging Away Debt follows real people on their journey to debt freedom — with tips on the debt snowball, budgeting, cutting expenses, and staying motivated.

by Ashley

I really love that we have four bloggers because each of us has a unique situation and unique circumstances in our lives. No one is “the same.” I think this makes it really fun to compare and see where we’re all at.

One thing that certainly strains the budget with small children is the expense of childcare. Currently, we pay approximately $600/month for care 3 days a week (and, believe it or not, this is one of the best rates in town! Literally half of what we used to spend at the JCC when we only went 2 days a week!) So that’s definitely tough.

But one area where I feel like we have things so much easier than the other bloggers is precisely the fact that our children are so young. I have seen the others talking about activities their children engage in, expenses for birthday parties, etc.

Sure, overall, we still spend a ton on things for our kids (due primarily to the childcare expenses), but I’m so happy that the kids are still young enough that we aren’t currently trying to combat spending on various extracurricular activities while we’re focused on debt repayment (I do wonder how long this will last though….there are lots of options that open up to 3-year-olds so we may only have another year before starting to pay for classes of one kind or another). Also, they’re still so young that there’s no big expectations for GRAND birthday parties that seem to have become the norm in the US culture.

You know what I’m talking about. We’ve all been to them, or at least seen pictures on Facebook and/or Pinterest. Kids’ birthday parties these days seem to cost the same as a wedding! You rent a venue, hire a face painter, maybe a clown or even pony for pony rides. I’ve seen parties with rented popcorn machines, cotton candy machines, and catered lunches for the grown-ups. For those “going cheap” and doing the party at home, I still see people renting tents, tables, and chairs. They rent a bounce house for the kids, and sometimes have live music or other entertainment. Cakes are baked by professional bakers with elaborate themes and multiple tiers. It’s an experience, for sure.

I have seen all of this, and more. None of this is made up or exaggerated in any way. And I have seen it for babies (literally 1 and 2 year olds). These kids are never even going to remember the party and their parents will probably be paying toward it (in the form of credit cards) for years to come. It’s all just too much. (Side note:  I am NOT suggesting this is what the other bloggers have done! I only referenced them because there’s been some discussion about the expense of kids’ birthday parties and I’m sharing things I, personally, have seen and experienced).

I am the opposite. I am a play-in-the-dirt girl. And while my kids are still young enough not to really “get” the hoopla, I’m going to embrace it.

So here’s how we planned a little birthday party for the girls on-the-cheap (note:  the party is this weekend):

First, I scrapped the notion of paper invites. Because I consider this more of a get-together (versus traditional party), coupled with the fact that this was a relatively last-minute shindig (we just decided to do it 2 weeks in advance), we decided to scrap the idea of paper invites. A few family/friends were invited through email, text message, or in-person communications. I do think that paper invites will be fun when the girls are school aged, so they can pick out the invitations and mail to classmates, but its just another unnecessary expense at this age.

Second, I came up with an inexpensive menu. Since food is a big money-suck, I wanted to plan something that would work for a small crowd (we invited 10 adults + 7 children) and wouldn’t break the bank. I decided on a simple menu. I have a tough time holding myself back (I ALWAYS overdo the food at any get-togethers we have), so I was meticulous about planning everything out and sticking to it. Our menu includes:

• Appetizers:  Chips (Costco), Salsa, and Guacamole (homemade)
• Entree: Chicken Sausages and Sonoran hotdogs (a Tucson thing – if you’ve never heard of one, see this).
• Sides: Pinto beans (made in bulk from dried beans), fruit salad (made from an assortment of fruit currently in season and on sale at Sprouts)
• Dessert: Cake (homemade) and ice cream
• Drinks:  Water, Iced Tea, and debating alcohol….what’s the “norm”? My husband and I aren’t big drinkers, but I don’t mind buying some beer if that’s customary.

That’s it. I had a friend offer to bring something and I said she was welcome to bring a side if she liked. I specifically requested that people not bring presents. We really don’t need anything and I don’t want people to feel obligated. I want this to be low-key – more emphasis on spending time together rather than birthday festivities.

Next, I came up with colors instead of a theme. I didn’t want to do a big “theme” because I didn’t want to get sucked into the whole warp of doing everything to the nine’s. Instead of “princess” or “jungle safari” or whatever else is common for 2-year-olds, I went with simple pink. I know we won’t have enough plates and cutlery for everyone, so I went to Walmart and bought:

• Two 10-packs of pink dinner plates (clearance for 50 cents each)
• Two 10-packs of pink cake plates (clearance for 50 cents each)
• Two 10-packs of pink cups (clearance for 50 cents each)
• One 24-pack of pink cutlery (clearance for 50 cents)
• One roll of pink crepe paper (99 cents)

In addition to these, on the day of the  get-together, I plan to send hubs to Dollar Tree to get some pink helium balloons. The girls are obsessed with balloons these days so they’ll LOVE them, and you can’t beat $1! Can’t find them anywhere that cheap!

The final step is just to stick to the plan! I’ve seen Mr. Money Mustache talk about avoiding consumerism as a way of saving money. Its SO TRUE! Just walking down the party aisle at Walmart was tough. There are SO MANY cute things! I start thinking – Oh, this would be fun! Oh, that’s cute too! Oh, the girls would love this! etc. etc. etc. Then I reel myself back in, remind myself that I specifically told everyone this was a low-key thing, and that I don’t want to embarrass myself (or others) by decking my house out after I’ve told everyone this is NOT a “party.”

Going along with the not-a-party theme, I didn’t plan anything for guest/goodie bags. I don’t know if this is considered a faux pas or not, but that’s what it is. We also didn’t get elaborate table cloths, center pieces, pinatas, etc etc etc. The plan is to hang out in the backyard while Chris grills up some food, and to enjoy each others’ company. I really want that to be the primary focus (the girls’ birthday as a secondary focus). I don’t mean for this to sound harsh. I’m sure at some point in the future we’ll do the whole piñata “real” birthday party shebang (minus the live entertainment, lol), but with them being so young I just don’t see the point in the expense for anything larger than this. I would rather get together with friends and enjoy ourselves.

How did you (or how do you plan to) celebrate young children’s birthdays? For the first birthday we literally did nothing. I bought a 4 pack of cupcakes from the grocery store and took pictures of the girls smashing cupcakes in their high chairs….no guests, no balloons, nothing celebratory at all. This year I wanted to do more to acknowledge the girls birthday, but still keep it really low key.

How did you (or how do you plan to) celebrate older children’s birthdays? Is there a difference? 

Do you serve alcohol for adults at a child’s birthday party? If so, what do you serve – beer? wine? both? I can make a mean pitcher of margaritas (I’m from Texas, remember?), but it seems like hard liquor is a little much for a child’s birthday. What do you think? FYI – this is going to be a dinner thing (as opposed to lunch thing), in case that makes a difference.