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Mental Health Setback


I can’t post today without acknowledging my mental health took a beating this week. And that’s affecting our finances. I’m becoming familiar with the CDC’s phases of a pandemic, but it seems they don’t include my current stage on their list: Explosive Anxiety Freak-Out.

I’ve been a worrier for as long as I can remember. I remember in college I called it “excessive worrying” because I didn’t know how else to describe it or how to stop it. Even as I started my career, got married, and had kids, I didn’t know how to manage all that worrying.

Diagnosing Anxiety

In the summer of 2016, I was spread to the limit. My dad was on hospice care after seven years of cancer, and I was traveling back and forth to Denver to see him. In July we bought our business, and then in August my dad passed away. In the midst of my grief, I still had small children to care for and a business to get rolling.

One day, I had a panic attack. It was equal parts new and familiar, and it scared me. Gratefully, my sister was able to recognize it and point out that I most likely had anxiety.

Anxiety! Of course. Just having a name for it was empowering. I was able to research it, study it, and find a wonderful therapist who gave me tools to improve my mental health.

Anxiety Flare-Up

Like many people, the pandemic is causing my mental health problems to spike. The seemingly endless uncertainty, the weirdness of everything, and the loss of income are all throwing gas on the fire. Anxiety can affect your mood and thoughts, and it can make it hard to think clearly and solve problems. Plus I’m not sleeping well and have no energy.

So even normal problems or things I could usually shake are causing me to shut down. Pet bunny escaped? Rattled me for hours. Car battery died in a Lowe’s parking lot? Set me off course for a full day. Hearing colleagues opened their offices even though the governor’s mandate forbade it? Still bugging me.

Financial Effects

And since mental health issues are closely tied to financial issues, here are some financial effects:

  • I haven’t been updating our budget in the Every Dollar app
  • I’ve stopped regularly checking our bank accounts
  • I can’t motivate myself to still prep our house to eventually sell
  • I have been ignoring our debt payoffs, and honestly can’t even stomach checking in on it


So I know I’m not the worst I’ve ever been, but I’m not in good shape. I’m recommitting to my tools that help: exercise, meditation, time outdoors, less time online, and eating better (enough is enough, lingering Easter candy). I have hope this week will be better.

I keep seeing Facebook posts about the pandemic that say “we’re all in the same storm, but we’re not in the same boat.” #Accurate. So if you’re in a boat that’s tipping sideways due to anxiety, depression, or some other mental health struggle, I feel you. And I’m cheering for you.

Ready for a Break from Beans & Time to Apply


Anyone else getting tired of their own cooking? Getting tired of stretching food and controlling the cost of each meal by adding beans? Or some other economical expander.

Sidenote: Did you know that bamboo can be used as a meal expander, it takes on the flavor of what it’s cooked with? I haven’t tried it, but I read about it recently.

Anyone else ready for some sort of normalcy?

We met with Princess’s guidance counselor this morning to talk about her senior year and the next steps for applying and financing college. Can you believe that she is 15 years old and a rising senior? I can’t! How did we get here!?!

We’ve got a laundry list of items to tackle, especially with the future so up in the air. And we’ve definitely got to start looking at scholarships, scholarships and scholarships. While Princess is on track to qualify for all the “free” college money from the state of Georgia including the Zell Miller, Hope Grant and more, with the goal of living on campus we are definitely going to need to add some additional monies to the pot.

I have to admit, I expected more guidance on the scholarship front from the school. She essentially told us she is too busy to help with that because of  all the colleges the kids at this school apply too. I was shocked! It’s understandable that this college prep school pushes for college acceptance, but they don’t seem to be as invested in making sure the kids are successful there. Or maybe just most of their kids are well financed that it doesn’t really apply to many. I was still shocked!

Any college scholarship gurus here in the BAD community? I would love any suggestions. We are going to make a plan for Princess to start regularly applying beginning next month when school lets out.