by Hope
Continuing on with my series this month to detail where the house proceeds went. You can find Part 1: My Car here.
Lumping two similar spends into one with this post. And these will come as no surprise to the BAD Community…
First, I paid for a week long family visit over Princess’ graduation. We stayed in a hotel for 3 nights. And we had two rooms. We ate out at least once a day. We went to Top Golf, the movies, and a museum. I also paid for a graduation cake for Princess.
Second, I paid for a wine tasting tour here in Texas for Princess’ 21st birthday. Well, I didn’t pay for an organized wine tour. I paid for wine tastings at three different wineries. She came for 10 days post-graduation, bringing a college friend along for a few days. And the two of them, plus my sister and I took a day and visited 3 wineries in the Hill Country.
Family Week in Georgia
All five of my kids, plus Beauty’s fiance, plus one of my brothers and his girlfriend gathered in Atlanta to celebrate Princess’ college graduation. So these costs cover 9 of us.
Each of the kids paid for their own travel, their own alcohol, and some activities while they were here.
Hotel: $982
Meals, Entertainment, & Top Golf: $2,128
Total Cost: $3,110
Brother/Girlfriend Contributed: $450
Kids Contributed: $150
My total spend: $2,510
Princess Birthday in Texas
Princess and her best friend from college came towards the end of June. We had planned a “wine” tour for her birthday. It was her present from me for her 21st. And it was kind of a girl’s trip with my sister.
Hotel: $329
Wine Tour: $340 (this does include 1 bottle of wine that I purchased and shipped to her apartment so she could have a bottle of the first wine she ever had in a tasting)
Meals: $217 (these are the ones I paid for, my sister paid for a couple of meals as well)
Total spend: $886
Before you ask, we chose a hotel in downtown Austin for two reasons (vs staying at my parents). My dad/parents are teetotalers. Never drink, never have it in the house, and don’t approve. So out of respect, I didn’t want the girls there on days they were drinking.
Our original plan was to find a small town, stay in a bed and breakfast, and pay for a wine tour company. But after my sister and I did the research, it just didn’t make sense. I don’t drink so no reason for me not to drive.
Staying within walking distance of two of my brothers’ places, meant we could meet up for meals. And the girls could go out at night without me needing to drive them or them needing to drive.
It was a very fun couple of days. Then Princess and her friend kept my car and moved to Gymnast apartment for the duration of the stay.
How Much Did All this Cost?
The total spent out of the house proceeds for these two events was $3,396.
Could we have done it cheaper, yes.
Would it still be as memorable, yes.
Do I wish I had done a few things different, most definitely! In my defense, the last months in the house were excruciatingly hard mentally. I am typically spot on with planning and finding fun and cheap. But I just struggled so much. That both of these events were very last minute and unplanned. Very odd for me.
But do I regret even a single minute spent making memories with my kiddos? Absolutely not.
After this second part in my How I Spent the House Proceeds series, I’ve now detailed out: $5,539. More to come…
Hope is a resourceful and solutions-driven business manager who has spent nearly two decades helping clients streamline their operations and grow their businesses through project management, digital marketing, and tech expertise. Recently transitioning from her role as a single mom of five foster/adoptive children to an empty nester, Hope is navigating the emotional and practical challenges of redefining her life while maintaining her determination to regain financial control and eliminate debt.
Living in a cozy small town in northeast Georgia with her three dogs, Hope cherishes the serenity of the mountains over the bustle of the beach. Though her kids are now finding their footing in the world—pursuing education, careers, and independence—she remains deeply committed to supporting them in this next chapter, even as she faces the bittersweet tug of letting go.
Since joining the Blogging Away Debt community in 2015, Hope has candidly shared her journey of financial ups and downs. Now, with a renewed focus and a clear path ahead, she’s ready to tackle her finances with the same passion and perseverance that she’s brought to her life and career. Through her writing, she continues to inspire others to confront their own financial challenges and strive for a brighter future.
I have a bad feeling this series is leading up to you having no money left. I really hope for your sake that’s not true. Your income is volatile, you need a nest egg.
No, I actually wrote the ending first. I wrote how much of the house proceeds went to savings. That all remains there.
Approx 15% of house proceeds ended up in: investments (ROTH IRA), EF ($1,000), and my Ally account.
This series is explaining where the other went.
And you are back to justifying blowing money.
Nope, just explaining where the house proceeds went.
You spent something like 10-15% of all the money you had on Princess’ graduation and birthday
After telling us it would be all low key and cheap and no big hurrah. Just so frustrating to read.
Actually spent 6% of house proceeds on family week and Princess birthday/girls trip.
So. 6% of the sale proceeds from your only asset.
And you don’t understand that is a nuttburger sandwich on a wtf bun.
Normal retirement savings at your age is 8-9 times your average income.
You have 1000 bucks in a roth.
You spent more in a party than you have in your Roth.
Your values, and respect for your own independence in the future are way off.
Is that 6% based on the total house proceeds or house proceeds after debt payoff (less student loan)? I am talking about your day 1 after credit cards were cleared. Effectively, that’s all the money you had. Either way, it’s depressing that you still want to defend this. It’s not like you can say this is only the first or second time you splurged on family. Hopefully you get on board will treating your future self better very soon.
6% of total house proceeds.
My future self will always prioritize family time. But I also know that now that the kids are adulting the times we will all get to be together for an extended time like this will be few and far between.
I understand your thoughts on family time. The point is more that you have been and will continue to be financially insolvent under your running definition of prioritizing family time. I believe family is the people together in simply a location, topgolf is not family. Topgolf is about something other than family. This is very reminiscent of the NYC trip.
Girl, what? This is just indefensible. Sorry, but your kids don’t need to be spoiled when you have no stable income.
You only had a new worth of a few thousand dollars after the house sale and paying off previous debt. Memories with your children that cost ate a great deal of your savings are not a need.
But then again, you don’t give anyone your income so who knows?
But honest question- what is your definition of stable housing? I just don’t see counting on parents to keep a roof over your head at 50 stable.
I am living with my parents as a caretaker. The move wasn’t made solely because I just wanted to sell my house.
So for now, as long as that caretaking need is there (see post about Aging in Place), I do have stable housing.
This has been in discussion amongst my siblings, my dad, etc. for years. The need.
This wasn’t just Hope’s selling her house and going to live in Texas. If I had a choice, or chose to make a different choice other than helping with my parents, Texas would have probably been my last choice. It’s way too hot for me here.
If they stopped needing you tomorrow, what’s the plan? I did caretaking for my parents for many years,but I wasn’t dependent on them, I had, and could afford, my own home.
What would you do?
You mean, if my parents died tomorrow? Well, first I would have to facilitate the house sale. Ugh, I dread that thought.
Then I would hopefully know where I want to go next.
I can afford my own place. There’s just no reason to spend that money when I am needed here.
That was confirmed as I have been travelling back and forth for the past year, staying here weeks at a time. Why spend money on housing when I have to be here? I don’t know why this is so hard to understand.
Hope,
Clearly many of the people commenting have different life priorities than you do. I personally think it’s insane that people are criticizing your choice of helping your parents out. Now, could you have done your family celebration cheaper…maybe. But you mentioned it was what…9 people. That’s a pretty good price for 9 people for that time period! You clearly were not just blowing money and frankly….too many people die with regrets of not spending time with family when they could. As long as it is a 1 time thing and you made smart decisions with the rest of the money I think you were entitled to do what you want. Now, if you had forgone paying off the credit card debt I would be on the other side but student loans have such a low interest rate frankly many financial advisors will tell you to invest the money rather than pay them off early because you can make more in interest in some CD’s than you are paying let alone stocks.
That being said, I am very interested to see where the rest of the money went and what you do from here with your income.
I think a lot of people watching her spend have the same priorities- they just understand that you shouldn’t waste money on an event when you have 0 housing, 0 savings, health issues, decided to get airpods instead of new hearing aids … ? This money could’ve gone to actual hearing aids and not earpods,respectfully.
Let’s compare…$8K for a new pair of hearing aids or $300 for a pair of headphones that actually work way better for my work than my hearing aids ever did.
It wasn’t a hard decision for me. I spend 6+ hours on the phone for work. My headphones allow me freedom of movement (since they have a mic), sync simultaneously with my computer, my ipad and my iphone so if I have tech issues or battery issues, it’s seamless. The headphones automatically adjust the volume if someone around me talks to me, I can turn on noise cancelling so the “background” noises don’t overwhelm what I’m trying to hear like a conversation.
I get those who don’t wear hearing aids don’t have this experience. But this $300 investment has made a world of difference for my work life and for my comfort. (My sister tried my headphones with hearing aid functionality turned on and she was amazed. She doesn’t have any hearing issue.)
Do I need new hearing aids, yes. But this $300 has addressed the largest issue I have…work. I don’t really socialize much so outside of work, hearing isn’t a big issue.
You don’t have to pay $8K as many people have told you. Costco has them for $1.5K.
The problem is YOU NEVER LISTEN TO YOUR FEEDBACK. You do what you want to do which is blowing money recklessly instead of paying attention to the people advising you of smarter, cheaper choices.
Just for ONCE, take in the excellent advice you’re given instead of arguing.
I don’t even want to spend $1.5K on something that doesn’t do all the things these headphones do.
I’ve actually got an appt at Sams Club. But again, am in no rush to spend any amount on new hearing aids when the AirPods solve all my problems.
You spent money on graduation, a party, etc – which could have gone towards hearing aids. You need them to drive, no? And you spend time with your mom, and now you’re going back and forth between your moms and Princess’ place doing caregiving work. I definitely think you need them – the airpods are a short term solution, for sure but you said there’d be no big hurrah for the graduation. It’s not that your kids don’t deserve nice things or you should not give it to them, but you continue to give when you have very little in the first place, and that won’t be changing so really, what else can we do? I would never want my mom spending over 3k if she needed it for herself, is all.
Absolutely do not need hearing aids to drive.
The only “need” for my ears is work. And these headphones do all that my hearing aids do and more and better.
The firmware for the AirPods is a FDA approved hearing aids device. These are in fact a validated hearing aid device.
With a lot lower price tag, google it.
You do need them to drive, since your hearing is that bad you didn’t hear the sirens when you got pulled over, or am I misremembering that? :/ They’re an interim solution I thought, not a permanent solution for the issue at hand. You say we’re helping you be accountable but you rarely take in the good advice given.
you know what I know nothing about driving without hearing so I apologize. I just think it’s concerning to folks to see this all play out.