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It’s Been a Year since He Went Away


This is more of a personal update and while this event had significant financial implications, I am not discussing them in this post.

It was one year ago today that I prepared to say good bye to Gymnast as he left to move in with his dad. He enjoyed a final Halloween at my Grandmother’s and left early the next morning to drive to Illinois with his dad. I HATED it! I was devastated.

And I spent Halloween night crying in the dark of my room. Already missing my baby and plotting the demise of his dad. (Just being honest.) As hard as raising Gymnast alone had been up to that point, I was not ready for him to leave. I would have never chosen that. I didn’t think he would have either.

But Now…

I know that move was the best thing that could have happened for all of us! I was able to turn my focus to the other kids. Gymnast had taken over my life, all of our lives really. And Gymnast has been able to grow and mature in a way I was not able to help him with.

Our relationships are beginning to heal – mine and Gymnast, the twins and Gymnast and Princess and Gymnast. It has not been an easy road. The years leading up to the move were not easy. But I think we have all turned a corner.

As I look back on that very dark time, I am grateful for the lessons and growth we have all gone through this year. But I would never, ever wish the separation of a family on anyone.

Tonight I celebrate a year of change and growth. I went into it kicking and screaming and crying and terrified. And here I stand, proud and happy, we have overcome so much, together and separate. I am truly blessed.


    • Reply jj |

      I am pretty sure she now has to send his dad some kind of support $$, vs receiving it maybe? Or maybe she has more $$ if the dad has agreed to cover all costs for Gymnast!

      • Reply Hope |

        Neither…there was no child support agreement to begin with. And now that we each have a child, neither of us would be able to collect, even if we attempted. Which we wouldn’t.
        I’ve stated before that I continue to pay for Gymnast phone bill as well as cover him under my health insurance since his dad can’t/won’t do either of those things.

  • Reply shanna |

    im so glad this has been a positive move for all of you. sometimes the distance is what you need to be able to create better relationships and dynamics.

    • Reply Hope |

      Absolutely agree with this now. But I think it’s heartbreaking for any parent to be away from a minor child like this. I wouldn’t wish it on anyone.

So, what do you think ?