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March Bump Update…


I’ve decided to do a once monthly bump update. If you aren’t interested, sorry. Skip this and resume reading tomorrow. ; )

February 2, 2011:
I express grave concern to my husband because, at 16 weeks, my stomach is flat. “Do you think the baby stopped growing?!? Do you think something is wrong?!?! Oh my gosh! Something is wrong isn’t it?!?!”

February 3, 2011:
At the doctor’s appointment, the doctor says, “Hmm. The baby is a little larger than I expected.”

On the way home, I wail, “I’m going to have a jumbo baby!! Oh dear Lord. What did I do wrong?! Why do I have a behemoth fetus!?!?!? Shrink! Shrink!”

At a red light, my husband hits his head on the steering wheel repeatedly.

February 10, 2011:
Some people are finding out about the baby at work. Most are shocked and make expected remarks like, “I can’t even tell you’re pregnant!” and “You are simply glowing!” A guy from finance says, “Weird, I was thinking about asking you if you were pregnant last week. Your hips look wider.”

HR spends 15 minutes lecturing me about the appropriateness of comparing a fellow employee to a ‘donkey’s hind quarters’.

February 11, 2011:
My husband posts a status update on his Facebook that says, ‘Got to feel my baby move for the first time last night! Man this is awesome.’

Meanwhile… I felt nothing. Since when is it normal for the HUSBAND to feel the kid move first? Welcome to my life.

February 18, 2011:
My brother’s friends come over for ‘guy’s night’. They start talking about the baby and one of them says, “This is SOOO cool!” Feeling warmed by the tender moment, I smile… until he finishes, “We have a designated driver for the next 5 months!!”

February 24, 2011:
I discover that my love for the E-mealz menu planning service is fading. Not because E-mealz has done anything wrong, but because E-mealz doesn’t plan meals solely containing pineapple juice and carrot sticks dipped in ranch dressing.

20 Weeks


  • Reply Jeff Ryan |

    your hips look wider? really weirdo? how much time does he spend looking at your hips? anyways my wife has a big craving for brownies and ranch dressing. Good thing we are having the c-section tomorrow. Otherwise I’d be bumping my head on something other than the steering wheel.

  • Reply Carol |

    I love the baby updates! You will be wishing for that flat stomach shortly, when you can no longer see your feet. 😉

  • Reply Shannon |

    Earlier in the pregnancy I was all about dill pickles and oreos. Like, one in each hand, chowing down. Pregnancy does some very strange things to your taste buds! 🙂 Glad everything is going so well!

  • Reply Alexandria |

    Get some nice head shots while you are pregnant.

    When you are prganant (& feel like carp) everyone tells you that you are glowing, and you think they are crazy. But I swear the only pictures that I now feel are appropriate for Facebook are face shots during pregnancy. I can NOW see the glow. I look absolutely stunning. If people are telling you that you glow, get some head shots. Wish I had. 😀 It’s just a weird realization – took me about 5 years to appreciate.

    When I was pregnant my head was perpetually over the toilet. I wonder if this is nature’s way of making sure your tribe doesn’t ditch you during pregnancy. You are sick and useless, but somehow you look so good. 😉

  • Reply Makky's Mom |

    I love the bump update!

    Most ladies don’t have tummies that flat when they AREN’T pregnant, let alone half way through a pregnancy. I’m sure that tummy will pop out soon – probably in the next month or so. I look forward to seeing next month’s picture!

    In contrast to you, I was approached by an acquaintance at 11 weeks pregnant, with her saying “Oh, you’re having another baby! How far along are you?” When I told her 11 weeks, she almost choked and said “How many are in there???” LOL! We all blossom differently through pregnancy!

  • Reply Eboo |

    I enjoy the Bump update, and glad you’ve decided to limit them as well.

    I love reading your posts, no matter the topic. Your sense of humour always gives me a laugh.

    Thanks for starting my day once again, with a good laugh.

  • Reply Vicki |

    OMG!!! This was priceless!! Thank you for sharing this wonderful time with us! (I am still rolling on the floor!)

  • Reply karen |

    I agree with Jeff, that’s an odd thing for him to say. And HR should lecture him for 15 min.

    Funny post.

  • Reply Kate Watson |

    I randomly stumbled upon your older blog, which led me here. I have to say that I enjoy your writing style and your sense of humor! I hope that life holds many wonderful, delightful surprises for you and I wish you all the best in your soon to be new names of ‘mommy’ and ‘daddy’.

  • Reply Debt Donkey |

    Thanks for the good laugh…I’m laughing WITH you, not AT you, of course. During my wife’s five pregnancies she also constantly worried, “Am I too big? Am I too small?” and I had to try to figure out the right answer! There was no right answer! Anyway, best of luck to you. Children are a wonderful blessing! Enjoy your little one as much as you can….the years go by QUICK!!!

  • Reply Nicole |

    Yes, bump updates are good! Thanks for sharing it with us! Wider hips? Something like, “I’ll show you wider hips jack…!!”, would have come out of my mouth too. Oh my!

  • Reply GPa Stan |

    good stuff..
    ..Beks a hippie?
    you do need to look like 3rd base tho..by about month 5!

So, what do you think ?