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Posts tagged with: financial stress

Why I Decided not to Pay My Rent


It didn’t start off this way. I had every intention of paying my rent on time for my last month in my apartment. In fact, I even went in a week early and handed them a post-dated check since we would be out of town when it was due.
But then I woke up this morning beyond stressed about this month. It’s the first month I don’t have food stamps since I now make too much money. Ha, that’s a joke! And then I have all my regular bills, debt payments and additional moving expenses. Oh, and I won’t receive any of my ‘payments’ until the end of the month. So literally after paying rent a couple of small bills due the first week of the month, I would be BROKE for the next few weeks, and have to move.
I just couldn’t do it. I just can’t stomach it. So this morning, I woke up and put a stop payment on my rent check. And immediately the stress lifted, well, at least a tiny bit.
Now I’m not trying to dodge paying my rent at all, I will pay it and the ginormous amount of fees they will tack on, but I will do it in bits and pieces as I get back on my feet.
That’s where I am today, right now. Breathing again.

So Grateful – Short Term Loss of Income


There has been a change in my expected income for the foreseeable future. I certainly hope it’s for the short term, but to be honest, all it’s led to is a flooding of gratefulness.

Yesterday afternoon, my ex-husband called me and simply asked…”Will you be able to get my babies (our two kids) something for Christmas?” I knew where he was coming from, I knew he was struggling financially. And upon my assurance that our kids are well taken care of and want for nothing, he broke down in tears.

For all drama in our marriage and continued relationship because of our children, I KNOW without any doubt that if he could he would do anything for our children and even for me if I needed it. He is that type of man. I am so blessed that even with my failed marriage we have always been able to work together to put our children first. It’s certainly not always been smooth or easy or stress free, but when it comes down to it, neither of us doubts our committment to our children.

I’ve seen SO many terrible things come of broken homes and bad finances, that this interaction with him did not bring me stress, but rather a flooding sense of gratefulness for our warm home, food in our kitchen and so, so many blessings that it’s so easy to take for granted.

So for now, I do not expect to receive any financial support for the kids. I am also uncertain if he will be able to make his car payments ($350 per month.) He has a car that is financed in my name only. Per our divorce decree he is financially liable for any and all costs associated with it. He pays me for the insurance, car payment and taxes and takes care of all the maintenance on his own. As soon as the car is paid off, we will transfer the title to his name and be done with it.

I feel so terrible for him, I wish I could help, and I will where I can…but I’m also so grateful for this journey that I am on to get in a better financial place, for your support and tough love.