Blogging Away Debt Our Journeys to a Debt-Free Life

by Beks

The last time I moved was 14 years ago and it was 20 minutes from where I was living at the time. I was wholly unprepared for moving…halfway across the country…with a family of six.

Where did we go wrong??

1. We didn’t plan to pay for two houses for an extended period. We were remodeling our house in preparation to sell it and we didn’t expect the remodel to take so long. My husband is an experienced remodeler but so many factors messed up the timeline. It took more than a week to drive me from San Diego to Texas and get settled then hubby had to drive back home. He also had to spend more time with the kids since I wasn’t there. The remodel moved very slowly. We are covering two household expenses for 3 months. That’s a cool $20K. Add on the costs of remodeling and our checking account is on E. Hold on a minute while I cough up some blood. Emergency fund? What’s that? We haven’t gone into debt but that’s simply because I work every waking moment and we built a buffer in anticipation of the move…thank all that is holy.
2. We waited too long to sell things. We sold the obvious first: couches, tables, chairs. What we forgot about until the 11th hour? All the crap (excuse my French) in the attic and garage. We could have made a pretty penny on camping gear, tools, etc. but we had to get rid of it in 24 hours as we panic cleaned out the house for sale. We would have put it at fire sale prices on Facebook Marketplace but we didn’t have time to even do that which meant Goodwill got a huge load of expensive gear. At least we can write some of it off?
3. We sold stuff we shouldn’t have sold. Our motto, ‘We’ll buy it when we get there’ seemed like a good idea…until we realized that our dining table, refrigerator, deep freezer, and chair would have been less expensive to move. Everyone told us, ‘Sell EVERYTHING! Buy off Craigslist when you get there’. Those people are dumb. We have a trailer. We should have planned the move better. Fortunately we caught some of the stuff before we sold it and packed it for the move.
4. We packed too little the first trip. We bought a trailer for moving since rental moving trucks are only $3K less than buying a cargo trailer. The problem? We thought we’d have TONS of room…and we did…on the first trip. 40% was packed on the first trip. 87% was packed on the second trip. Math doesn’t add up? Yeah, I know. It’s called moving math. Be prepared.
5. We had no idea how much gas would cost. You’d think that we would be better at this since we spent a good portion of the last year on the road with a travel trailer. The difference is, travel trailers are super aerodynamic. Cargo trailers? Heck no. It’s like traveling with a parachute behind you. We stopped every hour for gas.

Regrets? I have a few…but man, I LOVE Texas.

Beks

Beks is a full-time government employee who enjoys blogging late into the night after her four kids have gone to sleep.  She’s been married to Chris, her college sweetheart, for 15 years.  In 2017, after 3 long years working the Dave Ramsey Baby Steps, they paid off more than $70K and became debt free.  When she’s not working or blogging, she’s exploring the great outdoors. 

by Beks

My mother and father don’t have the best relationship. My father has always worked insane hours and they never spend time together. They’ve been married for 50 years and they’ve taken a vacation together twice. My father works 7 days a week. He is rarely home for dinner.

My parents’ relationship was one of the reasons I left my job four years ago. I was working insane hours and my husband said if I didn’t leave that job, he’d leave me. When I complained to my mom, she said, ‘I’ve lived a very lonely life. Don’t do that to your husband.’

My dad worked insane hours and my mom spent money.

A lot of money.

I’ve talked about it before but my parents don’t have a dime to their name. They have debt. A lot of it.

My dad sticks to his story, he doesn’t spend money. My mom bleeds it. For decades, I was frustrated with both of them but I really knew who the spender was, it was my mom. I haven’t understood why she made such a mess.

Ugh. Karma.

I’ve been on my own for over a month and I’m experiencing a level of unapparelled loneliness. I have cleaned and reorganized the kids’ rooms every week despite the fact that they’ve never been here. I’ve spent hundreds on clothing for my new job because that will make me happy right? Twice this week, Amazon delivered and I couldn’t remember what I had ordered.

I’m trying to fill a void that can’t be filled with stuff…but that won’t stop me from trying.

This week there was a very real recognition of what was happening (maybe it was the Amazon boxes?!?!). I have slammed on the brakes. No orders without talking to Chris. Do I need his permission? Heck no! But I need accountability.

Loneliness is a rough place. If you are here, I’m here with you. I feel you. Buying stuff won’t fix where we are at. I’m reaching out to local religious groups because right now, I have no support in this new place. I’m finding support through the weekly community. Will that work for you? Maybe. Maybe not. Find what fills that void.

Spending ain’t it.

Beks

Beks is a full-time government employee who enjoys blogging late into the night after her four kids have gone to sleep.  She’s been married to Chris, her college sweetheart, for 15 years.  In 2017, after 3 long years working the Dave Ramsey Baby Steps, they paid off more than $70K and became debt free.  When she’s not working or blogging, she’s exploring the great outdoors.