I can’t eat. Seriously, hardly a thing. It’s easier than throwing up. I’m losing weight I don’t have to lose at this point and I’m hungry…and angry. I have a list of things I can’t eat. It’s so long, I jokingly asked for a list of things I CAN eat. Surely it must be shorter. Doctors don’t seem to get my gallows humor.
It’s made me grumpy. I generally eat healthy but I like the idea that I can eat whatever I want if I felt like it. Those days are gone.
We had to cancel the trip to Kansas over Thanksgiving to visit my sister since on the morning we were scheduled to leave, one of the kids was barfing. I was devastated. Paired with my food problems (did I mention I’m losing my hair too?!? Because that’s fun), I ‘perhaps’ wasn’t a pleasant person. We had no food in the house since we had planned to be out of town. Chris had to run to the store to pick up groceries and a Thanksgiving meal.
He was gone three hours.
I was sick. Again. I was angry. Why did he have to be gone three hours?!?! He called 2 hours and 45 minutes after he left. ‘Can you eat green beans?’ he asked. I looked at the mile long list, ‘uh yeah, I think so!’
‘I’m sorry I’ve been gone so long babe. I really want to make sure I’m not buying stuff you can’t eat and I’m not used to it. It’s taking a while. I’ll be home as soon as possible’
I hung up the phone.
I’d been so angry. Imagining him slowly slurping a Starbucks, eating the pumpkin loaf I love so much that’s on the ‘naughty list’, walking down the aisles enjoying time away from the kids. Instead, he was diligently reading every label. Finding things I can eat.
Myopically, I threw that away to focus on the misery I’m feeling. Forgetting that I picked a good one. Friends, I picked a good one. In sickness and in health. Pick a good one.
We’re all going through stuff. We all have things to deal with. It’s Christmas. Hug the ‘good ones’ in your life. The gifts don’t matter. The love you show does.
Beks is a full-time government employee who enjoys blogging late into the night after her four kids have gone to sleep. She’s been married to Chris, her college sweetheart, for 15 years. In 2017, after 3 long years working the Dave Ramsey Baby Steps, they paid off more than $70K and became debt free. When she’s not working or blogging, she’s exploring the great outdoors.