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Posts tagged with: pregnancy

I sold my body to science for $250.

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I always laugh when I hear about folks who participate in tests for pharmaceutical companies. It seems like a horrible idea to take drugs that haven’t been tested. I mean really, who does that?!?

*Meekly raise my hand*

Apparently there is a black market for pregnant lady blood and I decided to cash in.

My co-worker participated in a study on pregnant women dedicated to preventing the need for dangerous amniocentesis testing. No drugs are required, only blood donations from pregnant women.

The value of a tiny tube of my blood? $250.

I was reluctant to donate blood at first, regardless of how little was required, but gave in as soon as I visited the medical facility. It was cleaner than my doctor’s office!

Test subjects can donate up to 6 times over the course of 20 weeks, but I’m too far in my pregnancy and could only donate once.

I’m a bit jealous of my co-worker who is on her third donation and has fully furnished her baby’s room on pharmaceutical company checks but hey, I’m extremely grateful for my $250.

Yes, my doctor approved the donation. Yes, it was safe and sanitary. Yes, the check cleared.

And one day, I hope amniocentesis testing will be a thing of the past.


The Best and Worst $17 I Ever Spent…

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I haven’t been running lately, not because my doctor told me to stop, but because I feel weird about jogging down the road while my poor kid gets jostled like a smoothie in a blender.

My overactive dog likes running. He does NOT like walking. To prove it, he pulls relentlessly at his leash to show his annoyance that I’m now moving at the speed of a sea turtle. I let him get away with his antics for a few days until my sore hands could take it no more. I tried ‘delicately’ tugging back, stopping when he pulled, and outright begging him to stop but nothing helped.

I went to the pet store and purchased a $17 collar that promised to stop all tugging. I did exactly as instructed in the directions. I let him sniff it, gave him treats, let him wear it with no leash, gave him treats, put on a leash with no pressure, gave him treats, and grabbed the leash ready for a good pain free walk.

Given the fact that the $17 came out of our grocery budget and we’d be eating ramen for 2 days, I had fairly high expectations.

Ha.

He planted all four paws firmly on the concrete, completely unwilling to move. ‘Oh. So mature Hutch!’ I yell. I dragged him about 3 feet or so until he suddenly started walking. ‘ I win!’ I thought… until I looked back in time to see him throw himself on the neighbor’s lawn, roll over onto his back, and whine loudly as if I had kicked him.

The neighbor, of course, picks this opportune time to walk outside and wave hello. ‘Congrats on the baby’ he says over my howling dog, who now has his paw caught in his collar. ‘Thanks!’ I say, trying to ignore the fact that my dog is giving a better death act than most Oscar winners. I pause. ‘Um. I promise I’ll be a better parent than pet owner’ I say loudly as my dog walked over to my neighbor’s feet to throw himself at them… still howling. ‘Uh huh’ the neighbor says doubtfully.

I quickly pick up my wayward dog, STILL howling, and walk down the street before suffering further embarrassment.

It was a slow hour long process with lots of whining – mostly mine – but I think we finally figured out how to walk in peace.

Now, off to figure out how to make my husband not throw a similar tantrum in the neighbor’s yard when he hears we’re having Ramen for two days.


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