“Monthly Spending” Archive
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My husband and I both know there is some padding in our checking account. Paying overdraft fees is a pet peeve of mine so I try to make sure we have a little more than we think. This month, we both used the debit card a few times and before we knew it, the padding was gone and we were well over our budget. I had to do a pricey and frustrating balance transfer from our savings to avoid an overdraft.
I am very disappointed.
This event led to the following changes:
1. More involvement by both of us. Often in relationships, one person manages the finances. When things don’t go well and money is too tight, this person feels the stress, the pressure, and the responsibility for the mess. We have both decided to dedicate and hour each week to review each transaction. Now we have more checks and balances on each others spending – otherwise, we’ll have another bad month.
2. We are refocusing our goals and setting rewards. Our next payoff is still a ways away and we’re getting frustrated and bored. We decided to give ourselves something to look forward to after our next payoff. It’s nothing huge, maybe a dinner out or a trip to the theater, but rewards between payoffs has become something we need to stay motivated.
3. Reconsidering our numbers. We went back to make sure our numbers were working for our ever changing budget. We’ve been underspending on gas and overspending on miscellaneous necessities (car repairs, house repairs, etc.). We decided to adjust our numbers and perhaps pay a little less on our credit card so we can stop panicking when things aren’t balancing. Leaving the numbers the same would be great, but it’s obviously not working and it’s causing frustration.
4. We have decided to spread our focus. It’s easy to let finances consume our thoughts and lives. Rather than let this stress grow, we decided to let ourselves enjoy other things in life. Running, swimming, yoga, gardening groups, and organizing the garage help to keep our mind free of the finance clutter in our brains.
When there are long distances between payoffs, it’s important to work at what is frustrating you. You can’t solve everything, and it will be painful, but taking steps to at least reduce stress will help to prevent burnout. I’d rather take things a bit more slowly than give up entirely.
What have you done to motivate yourself and prevent burnout?
When my husband and I were first married, we kept our money separate.
We argued about who should pay for groceries, who should pay for dinner, and who should pay for everything in between. I hated asking him for his half of the rent each month. He was my husband – not my roommate. It finally came to the breaking point when he couldn’t afford rent and we had to clean out our savings and use our credit card to get by. We opened a joint checking account the very next month.
We learned to work beside each other and the arguing stopped.
We made our mistakes – financing nice cars, charging vacations to credit cards, and remodeling our bathroom on credit – but now that we’re working to become debt free, we are partners in the fight. I wish someone had told me early on that working together as a couple was a necessity for a good marriage and good financial health. As I listen to my co-worker talk about his wife ‘owing’ him money for tires on her car, I couldn’t help but think… ‘No wonder he’s on his third marriage.’
So how do we do it? We each get a $3 daily allowance in cash each week. I don’t care what he spends his on, and in return, he doesn’t care what I spend mine on. We usually spend the money on work clothes or a bi-weekly dinner out together. This week, we split the cost of a silly $15 video game we both would enjoy and a $25 set of solar lit pavers for our garden. (And yes I know, $3 may be more or less than you spend, but it works for us)
My husband and I rarely argue about money now that we’ve enacted the $3 daily allowance rule, but we still fight about very serious issues… like the direction of the toilet tissue.
Do you keep your money separate? Or do you have a joint account? And how much do you allow each other to ‘blow’ each day?
Confession time…
We went over budget by $90 this weekend.
I wish I could say it was on something important like an investment, a donation to the cancer society, or giving to help a military family but…
The $90 was spent on 5 flats of chicken thighs, 3 bags of charcoal, 4 fruit pies, green salad… and a round of golf.
My husband threw two hefty BBQ’s this weekend and went golfing with his brothers.
Fortunately, we both worked extra hours last week so we didn’t fall behind – in fact, we still came out ahead. Sometimes, inviting friends over to enjoy smoked chicken and homemade pies is worth it – especially when your BBQ is interrupted by an unexpected 20 minute fireworks show.
We sang Livin’ on a Prayer by Bon Joni while playing Rock Band late into the night.
I’ve been wonderfully budget conscious for months; I hope you can forgive this exception.
How was your holiday? Any budget hiccups?
I’ve been stewing over the latest property and sales tax hikes. I don’t understand why Arnold Schwarzenegger thought raising taxes substantially – in this economy – was a good idea.
But then again…
This is the same guy whose ‘sound judgment’ created the likes of Junior and Jingle All the Way.
And now, he wants to prolong it for several years through a special statewide ballot?
When I make less, I have to spend less. I can’t demand more money. Why can my state live financially irresponsible in a way that I can’t?
I didn’t give my approval on May 19th. I have to figure out how to survive on my new tiny salary; can’t I demand the same for my taxes?
Is this just a California thing or are you spending a couple extra Benjamin Franklin’s a month on taxes?
I’ve been asked to reveal my actual monthly budget numbers. I was reluctant at first and then realized it may be a learning experience and I should see if I am normal in my expectations of my money.
No, I am not going to reveal my housing costs. Asking a San Diegan to reveal her mortgage payment is like asking a New York housewife to reveal her age. The only thing likely to happen is a giant string of lies.
I’m also not going to reveal our charitable giving amounts. What we decide to give is a very personal decision and it’s not an amount I’m willing to change just to pay more on bills.
Savings: $50
Electricity/Gas: $105
Cell Phones: $100
Cable/Internet/Phone: $100
Grocery: $300
Gas: $260
Laundry: $10
Toiletries: $11
Clothing/House Repairs/Animal Care/Spending Money: $200
Water: $70
Trash: $18
All remaining money is used to pay our mortgage, our credit card, our student loans, and my husband’s truck.
So. Am I normal by the numbers? What does your budget look like?
I was reading an article in the Sunday paper that talked about spending habits and how to save money. The article stated that most money is wasted on big ticket items and NOT the $4 Starbucks you buy every morning before work.
Um.
I hate to disagree with a professional financial advisor but…
He’s dead wrong (and is obviously invested in Starbucks).
At least when it comes to me anyway.
I don’t buy big items. I bought my dining room set for $75 off Craigslist five years ago. My couches are ten years old. My bed is a hand me down from my sister. How do I spend my money?
According to my online banking… I spend it in tidy $20 increments over… and over… and over again. My money doesn’t flood out, it trickles. The article recommended taking 24 hours to consider every purchase over $100. Good advice, but the last purchase I made over $100 was months ago. It’s not the $100 purchases that are killing me!
I feel like the article should have simply said, ‘Watch where the bulk of your money is going and try to find ways to save from there.’
My goal this month is to watch my ‘trickle’ problem. I’ve gotten to the point that I have to seriously consider every item I purchase AND if I wait long enough, will it go on sale? will the newspaper run a coupon?… or will I forget I even wanted it in the first place?
Is your problem a trickle? Or a flood?
When my husband and I first moved in to our home, my brother moved in with us. He needed a place to stay and we aren’t the type to turn family – or their money – down. Soon, our house became a haven for ‘orphans’ and bachelors as roommates.
For the first few years, we didn’t need the money to clear our bills and we certainly enjoyed using it on dinners out and hotel stays. When I lost my job last year, the rent from our two roommates was vital in keeping our heads above water. Sure, it’s awkward to be nearly 30 and referring to ‘my roommates’, but it’s significantly less awkward than saying, ‘My debt collector’, ‘My bankruptcy attorney’, or ‘My foreclosure officer’.
If times are tough, maybe roommates should be a consideration.
Fortunately we haven’t had a bad experience yet, but this is a very serious decision and should be heavily thought out. We’ve stuck by some clear, yet simple, guidelines:
1.) Write a lease agreement – even if (and especially if) it’s a friend and you only expect them to stay a month or two.
2.) Have very clear rules – i.e. don’t go into my bedroom, don’t eat my food, don’t leave messes in common areas.
Some recommendations for roommates:
Firefighters: Their 24 hour shifts give you some much needed space – plus they are good to have around when you accidentally set something on fire.
Guys with girlfriends: I saw our roommate’s rent check more than I saw him.
Brothers/Sisters: You survived growing up with them, what are a few more years? Plus, it’s easier to yell at family about dirty dishes in the sink.
Some people you should never consider:
Perfect Strangers: I’d rather my family not appear on Dateline talking about how the new roommate seemed so nice… until he killed me.
College Girls: I lived through that once and it was enough. More drama than Jerry Springer.
College Boys: Not a lot of drama but I was over keg stands and frat parties eight years ago.
People with animals and/or children: Who needs pee on the floor and chewed shoes – oh, and animals are destructive too.
Do any of you have roommates? How is it working out?
About This Site
My Debt
- Original Debt: $38,495.86
- Paid: $11,384.98
- Remaining: $27,110.88
- Broken Down
- Auto Loan 1: $0
- Credit Card: $4,437.12
- Student Loan: $9,935.46
- Auto Loan 2: $12,738.30
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