by Beks
I’m not very good at accepting gifts (or help for that matter) from others. It’s a horrible pride thing and a genetic trait according to my father. When my husband and I got married, I HATED putting together a gift registry. It seemed presumptuous to assume folks were buying gifts and something else altogether to tell them what to purchase. But I listened to my sweet mother who said, ‘Well how else will they know what you need?!?’
Registering was no romantic or joyful occasion. We didn’t dance around the store choosing dishware. It was more of a, ‘No honey, you can’t put a lava lamp or camping gear on the list. Necessities ONLY’ shouted to my poor husband to be.
My sister-in-laws are throwing me a baby shower and asked if I had created a registry yet. A feeling of dread filled my brain. Fortunately, I’m trying to get better at the whole, ‘my friends are the sweetest people, would like to buy gifts, and I better keep my self-righteous mouth shut… plus… I REALLY need help’, so I smiled and said I’d get to it.
My husband, remembering the last registry experience, wasn’t too excited to wander Babies R Us wielding a scanner with me. But, as with most registries, the store is willing to give us 10% off anything we don’t receive as a gift so at the thought of saving money on the horizon, I promised to behave.
We arrived at the store, registered our information, and started the trek. We hardly made it into the bottle section before realizing we had made a HUGE newbie mistake…
Neither one of us have any idea what a baby needs.
Sure, Babies R Us provides a list of a million items ‘babies can’t live without’, but common sense tells me the list is slightly exaggerated. Problem? I don’t know which items I don’t need and I’m not about to waste money – mine or someone else’s – on junk.
Two hours and 5 phone calls to my mother, my sister, and my sister-in-law later, we emerged with a concise list of necessary items. Sure there were a few statements I made a bit too loudly like, ‘No honey. I’m NOT putting a teething ring on there. The kid won’t get teeth for like 18 months. Oh. Um. 12? Wait. When do kids get teeth?!?’ To which my husband responded with a firm grip to my hand dragging me to another section while laughing loudly as if I had made a joke, then he’d say through gritted teeth, ‘Don’t EMBARRASS me!’ By the end, I think he was truly terrified Child Protective Services was going to jump out from behind the crib section like undercover CIA agents ready to arrest us for parental stupidity before our child is even born.
Thankfully, CPS didn’t arrest us, the list is done, and no… there isn’t a lava lamp on there. Though, my husband did manage to sneak a Dr. Seuss book on when I wasn’t looking.
Whew!
Beks is a full-time government employee who enjoys blogging late into the night after her four kids have gone to sleep. She’s been married to Chris, her college sweetheart, for 15 years. In 2017, after 3 long years working the Dave Ramsey Baby Steps, they paid off more than $70K and became debt free. When she’s not working or blogging, she’s exploring the great outdoors.
That is SO funny and cute! Though it was uncomfortable, you will be glad when the baby arrives. Babies are super expensive due to disposable costs like diapers and formula (if you are doing that) and the amount of clothes he will go through. Even if your friends get you items for when he is a little older you will be happy to have them on hand, it will mean less out of pocket expense for you in the long run. Congratulations again, and I can’t wait to hear more, I love the bump updates!
Diapers, more diapers, still more diapers – hopefully you’ll use a service, but you’ll still need some of your own, formula, and, for those who don’t want to contribute to “stuff” (just look at most garage sales to see how much extra stuff most babies have), a 529 plan to help put baby through college. That’s when you’ll really need help!
The item my new parent friends sat up late one night debating whether to order via fedex was a velcro swaddling wrap. He showed us why when we visited days later. Let go of the newborn’s arms and he waved them around and started crying, hold them down and he fell right back to sleep. My friend said it was 1 in the morning and he was sitting there holding the baby’s arms down thinking, pay $25 for the overnight? pay $25 for the overnight?
Swaddled, I had never seen a quieter kid. It was scary. The nurse was like, you have to wake him for feedings, don’t wait for him to cry. Back in the womb, I guess.
You should check out amazon for diapers. They have the best prices – especially if you sign up for their subscribe & save. You can tell them how often you want them to send the diapers – every month, every two months, etc. My friend says that it’s cheaper than Costco, Target, and Walmart – even with coupons. I think the shipping is free if you sign up for the subscription.
I’m glad there was a Dr. Seuss book on the list. You can never have too many books and you will be amazed at how a 2-3 month old is fascinated by colors. Libraries are great but our kids had a couple favorite books that we read over and over again. I wouldn’t want to have to go to the library to check out that book again and again.
One of my friends has an Amazon.com baby shower registry for her baby shower this weekend. She picked out things online and we were able to buy online and have the gifts shipped. I hate shopping in “real” stores, so this worked out well for all concerned!
Way to get it done! I know it’s a pain, but I’m sure you two picked out necessities that you will appreciate having :-).
This is hilarious as it tends to happen with me and my husband as well. Let’s hope Child Protective Services stays off my back.