by Beks
OK, OK. I caved.
I’m Christmas shopping this year.
We took a two year hiatus and as silly as it sounds, one of my favorite parts of Christmas is time spent wandering around the outdoor mall on a Saturday night looking for a sweater or a warm pair of socks for my husband. I love the smell of the giant decorated trees. I love the carolers singing in their early 1900’s garb. I love it all.
We aren’t going overboard. We aren’t buying gifts for his second cousin twice removed or my great aunt on my dad’s cousin’s side. But there will be a gift under the tree with a fat name tag that says ‘CHRIS’.
Dave Ramsey will simply have to forgive me.
Are you celebrating this year? Or am I by myself on this?
Beks is a full-time government employee who enjoys blogging late into the night after her four kids have gone to sleep. She’s been married to Chris, her college sweetheart, for 15 years. In 2017, after 3 long years working the Dave Ramsey Baby Steps, they paid off more than $70K and became debt free. When she’s not working or blogging, she’s exploring the great outdoors.
Dave is not against Christmas. In fact, he agrees with Santa. Make a list, check it twice: don’t spend more than you intend. So far this plan is working ok for us. We are staying in budget for everything except one slip-up regarding the kids. My wife and I both bought a different gift for our oldest thinking that we were within budget, not knowing the other had made the purchase. He will enjoy both and we are quibbling over $15 so we did not have the heart to return one of the items. The solution was to adjust the budget elsewhere to allow for this.
I am still doing gifts but my list for purchased gifts is short and I will stay within budget. I have been stockpiling baking ingredients while Wegman’s has had the basics on sale this quarter and while be giving gifts of cookies and candy to others, again within budget.
We don’t need any more decorations and since I don’t want to buy stuff from China, there isn’t all that much to buy anyway!
It’s just plain fun to give people gifts, isn’t it?
I am scaling back this year with my friends and family, but I need to give gifts to my boyfriend’s family this year. Our first Christmas together and while I won’t go overboard I’d like to get them something. I just met them so I don’t know them well enough to make any grand gestures. I think a few small gifts and homemade cards should be sufficient.
I’m sticking within my budget easily this year. Having gotten a divorce and swearing off credit cards (no current balances) I don’t have a lot of extra cash. My ex is the opposite and has already spent $300+ for each of our kids (11 & 15). I cannot compete, nor do I want to.
My problem is trying to get the kids to understand it’s not the dollar amount but the thought of the gift. We celebrate Hanukkah so tonight is the first night and the will be with me for the first 3 nights. Then off to their mom’s for the rest. I am waiting for the question and criticism to come flying next week 🙁
I have nobody to explain to but myself and my kids will understand in the end, I just am having troubles since this is the first holiday apart.
Matt,
Gifts are always nice, but what your children will remember in the end are the memories of what you did together, not what you bought them. This is true no matter how spoiled and material you think they might be.
Find some local low-cost or free activities, go to a park, etc. My 15 year old daughter and her boyfriend (lord help me, I’m not ready for this) are, weather permitting, going on an outing this Saturday to a local park with a stream with very large boulders in it. They can walk down the stream for about half a mile before they get to a small waterfall. If they don’t freeze to death, they should have a lot of fun. I was the one who suggested this as a possibility and she got really excited and talked for about 10 minutes about remember when we did that the first time and remember when we took this friend there and then that friend and then a bunch of kids. We haven’t been there in 4 or 5 years, but she remembered it and is really excited about taking another friend there.
I never did skip Christmas, even when we were getting out of debt. But I did stick to a much stricter budget back then. I really like giving gifts and I also get a kick out of writing big checks to charities at this time of year. Well, they are big to me. 🙂
Mar,
I know you’re right. It’s just frustrating to me that I am worried about it at all. I got them gift cards to local stores with things that they like and will use long term, not an expensive flash in the pan.
This year I was smart and took advantage of cyber Monday and got my daughter a digital camera and a cooling pad for her laptop all for $100.00. (Thank you Amazon.com). However, being that she lives with her father in Missouri, it is going to be extra tough for me. Like Matt, it is my first Christmas away from her. As for gifts for anyone else, I just have my boyfriend, his mom and daughters. That is all. I can’t afford anything else.
About all I can do is echo what’s already been said here. Have a gift budget and stick to it. Go to the mall with a list and don’t deviate from the list. You can be frugal and still enjoy the holidays.
I’ve really scaled back on my Christmas budget this year. Chosen more simpler, experience related gifts. Even though I’m spending less this Christmas, than in the past, the gifts are definatley more thought out.
One more note on this: If you don’t have money, you can still have fun with this. My daughter was ready to tell her aunt that she wanted a new boyfriend for Christmas, but didn’t think that even her aunt could provide that. However, I’ve decided that I’m getting a big piece of cardboard and making her one. I’m not good at art, so I’m not sure how the face will come out, but I can put a t-shirt and shorts on him and maybe pick up a wig at the resale shop and cut the hair into an appropriate teenage boy style (whatever that might be). He’ll come complete with a bag of her favorite candy and maybe flowers. She’ll remember this for years and her friends will think it’s funny.
Matt, they will love the gift cards and hopefully they already understand/know that you’ve taken control of your financial life to be better able to provide for yourself and for them in the future. If they don’t know this, you should tell them. Have a happy Hanukkah and make it about time for you and the kids, not just the gifts.
Vicki, I don’t know how I would handle having my daughter out of state for Christmas. I hope you are able to see her sometime over the season or at least do the Skype/teleconference thing with her often.
Mar,
Thanks, I think you’re right they will like the gift cards and by supporting local stores I feel pretty good about supporting my neighbors as well.
Christmas is my favorite day of the year. Even when we were getting out of debt, we still celebrated. We just shifted a little money in our budget, turned necessities (like clothes and new shoes for the kids) into presents, and stuck to a budgeted-amount. I hope you and yours have a blessed time – and super-awesome New Year!
Good for you! BTW, did you know Dave has a sale on some of his products right now? The cool wallets and lots of his books and CD’s are only $10 each! Check it out : )
It’s going to be a tight Christmas for us this year. We must come up with $1200 by the end of December for son’s college tutition. But I am still going to make a big meal and buy a few small things. I would be heartbroken if my boys didn’t have something to open on Christmas morning.
@ Mar – My daughter and I will try the Skype thing. Just need to set up a time for her to be on. The problem is that they live with her older sister who has two small children, so getting quality video time is tough. It has been very difficult emotionally, but I pray daily for strength and comfort.
We always do gifts. Gifts is my main love language, so Christmas just isn’t the same without them. This year, we are scaling back. The kids (teenagers) are getting stockings and a few little gifts; no big ticket items, at all. Dh and I never buy each other anything, but we need a new microwave, so that’s our gift to each other.
I buy for my parents, dh’s parents, my brother, his fiancee and her kids and my niece. My other niece and two nephews from out of state (just $10 gift cards). I bought a small gift for each of my Bible study girls (there are four).
I started really early, so only have a few things yet to get. Spreading it out over several months has really made it much more manageable. Oh, and we always pay cash.
Vicki, quality video time all the time would be nice, but any time will be beneficial. If she can take the laptop into her bedroom or another room for privacy, that would be nice, but it might not always happen.
Good luck on getting through Christmas under these circumstances. Hopefully next year will be better.
Good advice! And thanks Mar!