by Hope
I think one of my most controversial ongoing decisions on this blog is my commitment to homeschooling. Now I will admit this summer has been a doozy for me emotionally, and the thought of just sending all the kids off on buses for 8 or so hours a day has been appealing at times. Of course, then I think about all the calls from teachers I would get because of certain behaviors or disorganization or…and the hours of homework each night and so on. So it’s been pretty easy to squash that thought even in my most miserable times.
And then today I saw this article posted online and I was so grateful for the logical and statistical reasoning for homeschooling…Homeschooling is the smartest way to teach kids in the 21st century
My way is the smartest way! For once! And maybe not to all. But right now, I’ll take that win.
We are actually starting school this week. I’m super excited about it. We are not returning to our co op, and the classes I had planned to teach for money, well, that didn’t happen either. So the money stress is off. I bought some new curriculum in June at our state’s homeschool convention, have dug through some of my older stuff. If they were in public school, I would have a 6th, 7th, 11th and 12th grader, but in reality I have a 5th grader who is in high school science, a 8th grader in high school English and math, a 12th grader who just has to take a limited number of classes at a time, and a college level student who just needs to catch up in math.
I love that homeschooling lets me really cater their learning styles, bolstering their weaknesses and really let them fly in their strengths. I know not every agrees with this choice and the limitations it has put on my job search at times, but I know it’s the right choice for my kids.
On the job front though, as I am truly looking and applying for most anything, I decided to eliminate my homeschool conditions for employment. I know I can homeschool at night or weekends…or even longer lunches if that is an option. And with the right money, I could afford to hire some help to at least keep the kids on track.
Just ending with “Homeschooling is the ‘Smartest Way'”…sometimes it’s just nice to hear that.
Hope is a creative, solutions-focused business manager helping clients grow their business and work more efficiently by leveraging expertise in project management, digital marketing, & tech solutions. She’s recently become an empty nester as her 5 foster/adoptive kids have spread their wings. She lives with her 5 dogs in a small town in NE Georgia and prefers the mountains to the beaches any day. She struggles with the travel bug and is doing her best to help each of her kids as their finish schooling and become independent (but it’s hard!) She has run her own consulting company for almost twenty years! Hope began sharing her journey with the BAD community in the Spring of 2015 and feels like she has finally in a place to really focus on making wise financial decisions.
Since becoming a mom, I’ve realized how much judgement there is about parenting styles/choices. You should do what’s right for you, and your family! If it works for you, that’s awesome! 🙂
So, so true! It’s amazing to me that moms especially can’t empathize with other moms more, rather than sizing them up and comparing. Just having my kids love often makes me feel like Super Woman — even when I do let them down. I checked out your site, looks really interesting…I’m going to be reading up there, looks like some great content!
Thanks Hope!
I have 3 boys they are 4, 3 and 18 months. I work full time at the stock exchange (a 2 1/2 hour commute from home 1 way) and if I could figure out how to make enough money for us to survive and homeschool my children I would do it in a heartbeat. My 2 oldest are in a Pre-K program through the public schools and I have had more issues in the last 8 days since school started than I could begin to explain. The frustration with my oldest (now 23) and the public schools and what is shaping up to be even worse with my littles has me looking long and hard for new options. I have been following you for a while and frankly you have been more of an inspiration than anything else. Even with the ups and downs, you have pushed on for what you have always believed is the best education for your kids. They always say a parent knows whats best for their kids, I applaud you for doing your best to ensure your kids get what you believe is best for them even though it has meant some large sacrifices.
Hi Taira,
I can only imagine the struggles you face. My motto has always been where there is a will, there is a way. So I’m sure the right fit for your family and boys will work itself out if you keep your eyes open for opportunity. And since you have been reading me for a while…well, you know I’m all about ‘outside the box’ ideas. Some fail miserably, but some change our world! Let me know if I can ever give you any direction with homeschooling. Sometimes people think it’s taking school and plopping it down in the middle of your living room, but it is so much more than that, and so very flexible to be shaped to your family, your lifestyle and your time table.
I always hold a parent who homeschools a child in great admiration. I imagine homeschooling takes great patience and fortitude. Neither of which I have. Public, private or homeschool education all can encourage, enrich and challenge a child. It depends a parent’s attitude.
Well done Hope for giving all you can to your kids. You are a special person!
Thank you, Stephanie, and I agree whole-heartedly, each parent knows what they can handle and what their child needs. Ultimately, the goal is to find the best fit for the child and the family.
Regardless of whether you work from home or at a traditional brick-and-mortem workplace, you might also consider the possibility of setting up some type of system to have the older kids teach the younger kids. The best way to LEARN is by teaching, so it would be a benefit to the older kids (and obviously to the younger kids, too, as they are learning new material). It would take the heat off of you a little bit, which is also a nice perk. Just something to think about. : )
Hi Ashley,
Don’t I know it!!! That is a very common practice with most homeschoolers I believe. The trick is finding the balance between giving your older children some responsibility and transferring what is ultimately the parents responsibility. I balance it by teaching the lesson first and then having them ask their siblings first when doing practice and review during that week. That way I know they are getting taught everything regarding a subject, but then they can get a different perspective from their siblings.
I think most of the controversy has stemmed from what was perceived as your unwillingness to give up homeschooling in order to find a job. I think it’s wonderful that you have been able to give your children the individualized learning that they obviously need and probably wouldn’t get in a traditional school setting (I say ‘probably’ because there are IEPs and gifted programs – my nephew in 8th grade started HS math in the 5th grade – but it’s definitely more effort to get your child enrolled in those programs). HOWEVER, I think part of being a good parent also includes providing for their daily physical needs in addition to their educational needs, and maybe the daily physical needs took a back seat to their educational needs – I think that’s what it’s looked like to some readers when you have been so insistent on homeschooling and maybe not taking a job that would not allow you to continue homeschooling (I don’t remember if that happened, but you already said above that it has been one of your criteria). I know it hasn’t been an easy road for you as a single parent, and then to lose your source(s) of income. You’ve done a great job of trying to make things work – and maybe to your detriment as you’ve suffered emotionally this summer. I hope you are able to find a balance between work/providing for your family financially and homeschooling/providing for your family educationally that works for you.
Jean,
One of my children does actually have an ISP (changed from IEP when he became homeschooled,) and received all those “special services” in public school. We’re talking speech, a helper in several classes, excuse from writing, calculator use whenever and even a special period where they were to help him on assignments, etc. However, with all that in place prior to me being in the picture, he still only tested at the 3rd/4th grade level for math in 7th grade, had failed most subjects in 6th grade and was still passed, and their goal for him…’be able to ride the bus independently.’ At my first ISP meeting, I was absolutely horrified! And by the 8th grade year, I was making changes to see if we could get him on track.
If you’ve been reading here, you know who this is, and I don’t want to point it out now. But I will say that he worked two jobs this summer, will test for his drivers license in the next couple of weeks, won the Ronald Reagan Leadership award after being put forth by his peers as a leader…and I could go on and on. If the public school system was not failing him, I would not have pulled him out. It was his what he knew, what he was comfortable with…that’s a hard thing to change after so many years. But in this case, homeschooling made all the difference in the world.
Sorry, don’t want to come across as defensive, but in the end, I would sacrifice most anything to give my kids the best.
I try to avoid bashing public schools, I know lots and lots of kids that do really well in them…I was one. And I know lots and lots of truly awesome teachers. But for some kids, homeschooling makes all the difference in the world. All the difference.
I’m sorry if I came across in a negative way that made you feel like you had to go on the defensive. I was trying to help you see why your homeschooling has been controversial. As I said, you’ve done a wonderful job tailoring each child’s education to their needs/abilities – and as you stated, you’ve seen the fruits of your efforts where they have flourished in the homeschool environment when they were languishing in the public schools. But what I think you missed in my comment is that as a parent, homeschooling (education) isn’t the only thing you have to provide for your children; you also need to provide for them financially. You ended your comment by saying that you would sacrifice anything to give your kids the best; I think that would be the sentiment of most parents. But ‘the best’ includes a wide range of needs, which is why I ended my comment with the statement that I hope you are able to find a balance for providing for them both educationally and financially. (This is a finance blog, after all!)
Hope, we haven’t heard from you in a month. How are you ?
It’s been a while since we’ve heard from you, and I wanted to know you’re still in my thoughts. I’m praying that you’re well, that you are getting lots of new job opportunities, and that your family is enjoying the new school year. Good luck Hope!
Sorry writing on my phone is cumbersome, that should say “I wanted you to know” ?
Hello? Are you still out there? Can we get a one liner to say you’re OK? Or doing better? We miss you.
Hope – wishing you well and hoping that everything is ok. Would be nice to hear something (anything?) to know you are ok!