fbpx
:::: MENU ::::

Why we need that emergency fund…

by

I’m so thankful that I decided to give myself a break this month and just sock extra money into the emergency fund.  I knew it was important given the tenuous times I am in right now, but I didn’t know how important until my paycheck didn’t show up on Friday.  I changed the direct deposit from the joint account to my separate account as soon as Steve told me he was moving out.  As these things often go, there’s a delay. So, the direct deposit was successfully cancelled but the direct deposit into the separate account was not successfully set up.  A paper check is “in the mail.”  So glad I had enough set aside to bridge the weekend.  That may not seem like a big deal but given these uncertain times, I’m taking it as a small victory.

Also, because I am really sticking to my budget and still had plenty of cash in my pocket I just did not have to worry.  There is so much relief in that!  While I was certainly aware that I didn’t get paid, it did not send me into an all out panic.  My budget habits are intact even throughout this turmoil and I do recognize how fortunate I am in that regard!

I did receive a waiver of service in the mail and although it was simply a form provided to Steve by the district clerk, I was not willing to sign the document.  It is entirely too broad.  So, I filed a pro se answer to the divorce outlining just three issues.  The first is that the signature loan that we just got earlier this year needs to be ordered by the court to be in my name only.  The loan is too new to be refinanced per the credit union but I can get a court order to put it in my name only.  That consolidation loan paid my separate obligations so that is how it should be.  We also have a $1100 tax obligation for 2011 that we need to split 50/50.  Finally, I asked for a name change back to my maiden name.  If all goes according to plan, the divorce will be final mid-November.  We have had no communication but I do know he refinanced his car loan b/c I had to sign the power of attorney to transfer the title.  Everything is happening via snail mail.

The overall feeling of relief continues to take root.  I can’t believe it has been just 3 weeks because it feels more like 3 months.  To have the distance from the unhealthy relationship has given me so much clarity.  I have my joy back and I am so thankful it was only 3 years of my life and not 20+ years like it is for so many.


14 Comments

  • Reply T'Pol |

    Good thing that you have your EF. I think it is the most important thing to have whether or not you are in debt paying process.

    A healthy EF gives you peace of mind and ability to keep cool when an emergency happens.

  • Reply OneFamily |

    That’s too bad you weren’t made aware that your direct deposit would be delayed one paycheck and a paper check mailed. I do payroll for the company I work for and whenever a new employee signs up for direct deposit or an old employee makes a change I always make sure to tell them the first check will be paper and mailed. Glad you were able to cover it!

  • Reply debthaven |

    I know this is silly but it made me laugh to think that as a lawyer, you were able to file that response yourself!

    Think of the money you’re saving LOL!

    Also, good for you for socking away money now. But I hope that come next month you will get rid of that small payment and get another zero!

    Once that is done, which loan will you be going after next? Because you are visibly a gal who likes goals.

    All the best to you! You are inspiring! Remember to be kind to yourself. It doesn’t need to cost a lot. 🙂

  • Reply Desperately in Debt |

    Hang in there, Claire! You’ll be back to paying down debt soon enough and as tough as what you are going through, the fact that you are sticking with your new financial habits is inspiring!

  • Reply adam |

    i’m glad you had some emergency$$$$!

    also it sounds like you are owning up to your part of the shared debt responsibility and making plans to tackle it. Moving in the right direction.

    I’m suprised how quickly these things can get processed – I always thought going through a divorce was like 6 or 8 months. I guess in this case there wasn’t a lot to go through.

  • Reply Renae |

    You probably know this, but just in case. The IRS generally doesn’t care what a divorce decree says about who owes IRS debt. They will continue to try to collect it from both of you. You may need to lower the tax withheld from your paychecks (putting the difference in savings, of course)so that you will owe when you file your 2012 return. Otherwise, the IRS will take your refund to cover the entire $1100 owed.

  • Reply Kim |

    Isn’t it great that you are in this better financial position as you go through this trial. It gives you so much more perspective and power. You are really able to deal with the trauma and not the financial problems which by the way mask other problems. If you had not gone down this road of financial freedom I can almost bet you would still be in your relationship. How lucky for you, but how painful. God has a plan my dear, he has a plan.

  • Reply JMK |

    I think the speed is likely because they aren’t arguing over custody or joint property. When you are recently married and have kept your finances fairly separate it really doesn make it all go more smoothly. The primary home is rented and the children are all from previous marriages. That really does simplify everything. When you start arguing over how to divide up the DVDs and if the house should be sold or one of you buys out the other it gets complicated.

  • Reply Ib |

    Wow, that is fast. Good for you.

    One more “baggage” out the door to your debt freedom. (I say this in the nicest way, not to diminish your emotional upheaval).

    I can see you moving in the gazelle intensity now!

    • Reply Claire |

      Thanks lb. Your comment inspired me during this difficult week. It is definitely a relief as with time and distance I am realizing just how burdensome life had become. I’m very good at putting a positive spin on almost everything and I was doing that in the relationship for the last year but I am exhausted. It was taking so much out of me! Happy for the new inspiration to kick the debt.

  • Reply Shawn @ PipsToday |

    Claire, I have been read number of uses of emergency fund in unexpected situations like health issue, big business loss etc. However, today I knew it may be more useful in the case of divorce. I hope, your divorce will be final mid-November and joy will come back in your life. Best wishes for your upcoming independent and joyful life.

So, what do you think ?