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Rough start for May…

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This is the first weekend of May and I can already tell things are going to be extra challenging on the financial front!  Historically, May is a very challenging month.  The end of the school year brings so many activities for us and the kids and that means more time away from home and…being away from home and on the road has a tremendous impact on spending.  We have tried to prepare but after today I see that we need to prepare even more.  I don’t know what to do yet but recognizing the potential for spending out of convenience is the first step.

Today I just felt like I was running around like a chicken with my head cut off.  There were errands that needed to be made involving small purchases–and I think b/c I went about running the errands without a real plan in place AND had the 2 youngest kids with me I somehow ended up spending more money than I thought I would.  The kids didn’t ask for anything and I can’t identify anything that I bought simply b/c they were with me but there IS something to be said for that distraction factor.  I feel a bit incapable for some reason that I don’t stay on budget or task b/c I have the kids with me while shopping.  Is it that it involves a lot of talking and explaining on this and that so that my attention is divided and then I end up just buying what I first find so I can move on?  I’m not sure at this point but I definitely see the difference.  Saying that I can and will only shop alone is not an option–so I need to figure this out.

I caved on the way home tonight and we stopped for fast food.  It was not at their request or suggestion but totally mine.  Frustrating but I guess it is bound to happen and I can’t totally freak out.  This is the first fast food we’ve had in a very long time. It stung to hand over $17.00 for 3 of us to eat and it wasn’t even good tasting or good for us food.   Meanwhile hubby was home with the 8th grader and 2 of his classmates as they worked on a school project.  After the friends went home hubby spent $12 on fast food for the two of them.  That’s $30 right there…GONE….Blah.

Tomorrow is a new day…


13 Comments

  • Reply Cathy C. |

    I know the feeling Claire! We always spend more in the summer and I’ve been really nervous about how we’re going to handle it. I also have had a less than thrifty weekend. Went shopping for completely unnecessary hobby supplies yesterday, stopped at a craft fair and bought a painting from a local artist that I couldn’t resist, AND went out to dinner last night. Add in the gas money that it took to drive to all these places and we spent over $200.

    We’ve been really good the past 3 months and paid $4500 down on our debt so I’m trying not to beat myself up about this latest slip. I feel like we were either rewarding ourselves for our progress so far or maybe rebelling a little at denying ourselves for the past couple months. Either way, we just have to pick ourselves up by the bootstraps and try again to stay focused.

    One thing I’ve found that really helps when it comes to errands and having to stop at the stores is to make an exact list of everything you need to take care of and purchase. That way you have less chance of veering off the path and purchasing extras and it helps keep you focused and in and out of there quickly.

    This is a really difficult journey…

  • Reply Sheila |

    Have you started menu planning yet? I try to do it every week (though not always successful!). As I plan I look at the calendar to see which days I will have more time to cook and which days would be better served with a crockpot meal. I also have a few standbys of easy/fast to cook such as spaghetti or mac and cheese. Not the healthiest of dinners but cheap (and still fast) if cooked at home. Also, I sometimes double a casserole recipe when cooking and keep one in the freezer. That’s easy because you can call home and tell someone there to stick it in and get it started.

    Also, I know what you mean about the end of the school year being more expensive. For us there are always teacher gifts, coach gifts, end of year/season parties, etc. Definitely something to consider as you are budgeting going forward. You know it’s coming so add it in.

    Good luck!

  • Reply Karen |

    One thing that helps with the impulse purchasing of fast food is to be sure to have snacks (fruit, crackers, etc.) in the car to tide everyone over until you get home. Also, have some quick and easy already-made meals in your freezer. It’s much easier to pull out pre-made burritos and pop then in the oven than to contemplate making a meal from scratch.
    A way to help with overspending to use only cash. If you head out to do errands, with a list of course, and only have along the amount of cash you want to spend you cannot spend more than that – leave credit and debit cards at home.

  • Reply Claire in CA, USA |

    As far as the fast food: This is why your budget should include fun money, or as Dave Ramsey says “blow” money. It’s a pre-set amount that you and your hubby (individually) have to spend each pay period on those things that don’t fall within normal budgetary guidelines (like pedicures, fast food, gum, Starbucks, etc.). It is in your pocket, in cash, and once it’s gone, it’s gone. End of guilt. 🙂

    As far as over-spending while shopping: Again, the budget and planning will solve these problems. If you have a list of the things you need, you tend to stick to the list. If not, you have to consider what the budget will allow.

    Involve the kids in your desire to stay within a set amount, and ask them to help you. I have one friend whose daughter would shop with her, and would ask “Do we really need that, Mom?” It really convicted my friend of the fact that she bought completely unnecessary groceries and household items on a regular basis.

    I think I said this before, but THANK YOU for being so transparent. It is refreshing and truly helpful to read of your struggles (because I sure can relate). 🙂

  • Reply scarr |

    I like what Clair in Ca said. I make a new budget every pay period for my husband and I. So, twice a month I sit down and rearrange funds and plan every penny. After allotting money for savings, groceries and all of the bills, I set aside $100 (so $200 every month) to just blow on whatever. That money sometimes buys a new book from Amazon or eating out or going to a concert. Sometimes it isn’t spent and it gets rolled into the next budget – not spending it happens more often which is why after savings and bills we keep having a large amount of slush money. It is just my husband and I, so I understand your situation may not see that much money left over every pay-period, but I think it wouldn’t hurt to just add even $20 into the “junk buys” section and save yourself some guilt.

    My mom was always very kind but stern in explaining why we can’t buy the $4 box of cereal instead of the $2 box or why we can’t buy chips. She never made us feel like we were poor, which we were for a time, rather it was her explanations for why we couldn’t have those things: chips aren’t healthy for you so you can only have them on special occasions or you don’t need that toy remember all of the things you already enjoy playing with? I am not a mother and I have no idea how hard it must be to not be able to give your child everything they want in life, but just think about all that you already give them: love, attention, food, clothing a house and happiness. They will remember that more than they remember you not buying them things when you go grocery shopping.

  • Reply Nicole |

    I like the comments about setting aside fun money to eliminate the guilt. At fast food, we only buy off the $1 or value menus. Brings the total spend down. And we never buy drinks…those are way cheaper at home.

    We have fallen victim to expensive dinners way too often after errands or being out for the day! Bringing snacks with often helps, because you’re not starving on the way home. Especially stuff with sticking power, like maybe half a peanut butter & jelly sandwich. We also keep a freezer stocked with homemade frozen dinners. I make meals that freeze well and my family loves (like black bean & rice soup), then freeze in individual containers. Just pop in the microwave when you get home. Cheap, fast, healthy! And everyone still can choose their own if you have a selection available.

  • Reply Internationalmom |

    Getting hungry or thirsty when out and about is the fastest way to blow a budget. I agree, have a budget for the occasional outting to spend for a treat, but keep bottled waters and maybe snacks like granola bars, packaged fruit snacks, etc in a baggie in the glove compartment to tide you over until you get home. Plan to take food in a small cooler if it’s going to be a longer outting. When you have the time make and freeze meals that you can quickly nuke when you’ve been out and about and need something fast. Our family even planned for snacks and quick meals like this the last time we went to China for an adoption so we didn’t have to eat out constantly. Ramen in the room occasionally was actually a welcome change from restaurants and having to go out to eat – go figure?

    • Reply Claire |

      International Mom! Bottled Water?!?! My readers don’t approve of bottled water! And careful with the use of “ramen” I was schooled on that in the early days. I AM KIDDING! Boy I hope the humor comes across in this reply! I live in Texas so every outing requires more than a small cooler when it is 100+ degrees outdoors. In all seriousness, I absolutely do all of these things when I am the groove….menu plan, grocery plan, snack plan, freezer meal plan…but sometimes I am human and just really, really do not want to do any of these things. Blowing the budget is the consequence of that reality and simply something I have to get over and deal with!

  • Reply Claire |

    Sheila–part of my above response was in reply to your post as well. I do all you speak of…when I feel like it which I guess is more often than not. But when I don’t feel like it…I don’t do it and that’s what has to change. If I am going to get out of debt…I have to do all of this EVEN when I don’t feel like it!

  • Reply Claire |

    Thank you Claire in CA! I need to find a way to simplify this sort of budgeting for myself. I am still trying to figure out how we budget for those things that are not “fun” things (like what you talk about here) but instead are the unexpected, unplanned crap that always seem to come up! I am having a terrible time getting a handle on those unexpected expenses that come up with the kids–from $1 needs for school stuff to higher dollar ($10-$20)needs for special projects…that really the school doesn’t give very much advance notice on. I need to set aside a set amount each week for those incidentals I guess and then rollover the leftover. It just seems to create so many subcategories that I am, at least for now, finding way too overwhelming.

    • Reply scarr |

      I keep a super secret (well not super secret anymore since I’m writing about it on the internet lol) cash fund in our safe. Once or twice a month I will pull out $20 from the checkout when I buy groceries and stick it in an envelope in the safe. When I receive birthday or Christmas money (my parents and in-laws are so kind to always send us a little cash for those holidays) I stick that cash into the safe as well. Right now I have $300 in the safe. In December I had over $400 and used that cash to buy Christmas presents.

      I know making categories for expenses can be such a pain, but maybe using a super secret cash envelope will eliminate that. Use it when you need it, save it when you don’t – and adding to it doesn’t need to be uniform. Adding $5 or $10 every so often really builds up. Also, whenever I have dollar bills around I stick those in the envelope as well.

  • Reply Den |

    With three kids I hear ya on the constant unexpected school expenses that crop up all year….so a few years ago we opened a second checking account and called it the Freedom Account. $100 was automatically transferred each pay check into that account…..then we would use that account for school expenses, lunch money, etc….it would build for awhile and then suddenly we had soccer dues or pizza fundraisers or new school shoes needed. It was a lifesaver to not have school issues derail our house budget. AND I stopped being mad at the kids for perfectly normal expenses:) AND we didn’t have a million subcategories in the budget – just SCHOOL.
    Something to think about….good luck and don’t beat yourself up about a rough day – we all have them and they make the good days even sweeter!

    • Reply Claire |

      Thank you Den–I like this idea. Maybe we could start with envelopes for each expense like someone else suggested. I need to figure out what the various expenses are b/c right now they are too loosely defined and then the money we get each week is “poof! gone!”

So, what do you think ?